Showing posts with label LEMAH. Show all posts
Showing posts with label LEMAH. Show all posts

Sunday, 19 April 2009

reflection

Muhasabah Cinta
Munsyid : EdCoustic

Wahai... Pemilik nyawaku
Betapa lemah diriku ini
Berat ujian dariMu
Kupasrahkan semua padaMu

Tuhan... Baru ku sadar
Indah nikmat sehat itu
Tak pandai aku bersyukur
Kini kuharapkan cintaMu

Reff. :
Kata-kata cinta terucap indah
Mengalun berzikir di kidung doaku
Sakit yang kurasa biar jadi penawar dosaku
Butir-butir cinta air mataku
Teringat semua yang Kau beri untukku
Ampuni khilaf dan salah selama ini
Ya ilahi....
Muhasabah cintaku...

Tuhan... Kuatkan aku
Lindungiku dari putus asa
Jika ku harus mati
Pertemukan aku denganMu

Tuesday, 2 December 2008

hakikatnya

"if only i can say im sorry....i really meant it...im so sorry...its my mistake too...everyone has own reason..."

tetapi hakikatnya.....

“Sacrificing your happiness for the happiness of the one you love, is by far, the truest type of love.”

"Too long a sacrifice can make a stone of the heart"

Kali ini entry ini bersifat santai.....
entah apa yang patut dirasai sekarang ini....
serba tak kena....
ku telan dan hadamkan sahaja......
tak ada kudrat lagi untuk aku melawan arus.....
bertafakur,berfikir dan menaakul.....
kini aku dimana?
bukan buang tabiat...
bukan tidak sedarkan diri...
bukan sengaja mengelak....
tapi dah tak tahu nak buat apa....
semakin cuba mencoret dan menafsir....
tiada kata nama...
tiada kata sifat....
tiada kata kerja.....
yang menerjah fikiranku....

Hakikatnya......

serabut....
tanggungjawab makin bertambah.....

mari membahagikan minda
60% - pembelajaran
20% - keluarga
10% - LTDN9
5% - suasana
5% - inilah yang paling sukar

waduh kok mana gue mahu ngerti semua ini.....

Hakikatnya.....

hidup dalam fantasi....
alam maya kebergantungan.....
keliru selaputi kejutan.....
tiada arah tujuan.....
fokus yang mencapah....

say cheese....maaf dipinta pada semua......

tak semua orang memerlukan penjelasan....
diam lebih baik dari berbicara.....
tidak mengenali diri sendiri....
punca utama diperkatakan.....
sejauh mana kebenaran.....
tatkala sahabat karibku setuju....
bonda yang sangat memahami...
setiap gerak geri dan riak muka....

AKU TERKESIMA TERPAKU
AKU BENAR-BENAR MOHON MAAF

Wednesday, 26 November 2008

i rest my case......

(My baby warded,t-shirt&other matters LTDN9,Running out money,heart to heart talk,haematology W2,travel with komuter,my dad,confusing at my hometown,Yayasan Negeri Sembilan,one call,terrible night,scolding,discharge my baby,d'mara,no connection,prof rashid,election)

After all sudden happened....

i prefer to be alone.....lunch at bakery...luckily ah soon joined me....he asked me "which posture is the best for digestion-standing or sitting?"...interesting question while he took 2 plates of nasi lemak...the other table-naja n lina is sharing speggethi..the time consumed by ah soon to finish up 2 plates of nasi lemak equals to naja n lina finish up their a plate of spagetthi..my lunch only yong tau fu sup...its more than enough for me for now.....getting out from ordinary world quite helpful...alhamdulillah...at bakery internet connection well....it is the best time for me to write...enough talking,enough pretending,enough to be strong,enough pressure,enough challenge,enough happiness,enough advice,enough for all....

now i rest my case...........
im tired....

special to my mum.....

mama.....
please be strong.....
i always back you up....
dont put so much worry....
it is a fate for us to face....

mama.....
please dont cry.......
my tears always drop....
when i think about you....
you are amazing woman....

mama....
obviously you know...
clearly you can predict.....
everything in your fingertips....
you can read my mind....

mama.....
before i left home....
before i kissed your hand....
before i headed to komuter...
before i asked for my favourite bubur....

mama.....
you captured me with a question....
the matters that really dance in my head...
i hide that just because i want to comfort you....
but you know your daughter very well...

mama....
my focus towards you and the family.....
increase since what happened at home...
i divert my mind towards our family...
but i dont want to cry in front of you...

mama...
we will take a good care of ayah and mama
mama...
be patience
mama...
be strong

mama...ill grab whatever you adviced and guided me to handle this situation...but im so sorry that i have to rest my case...

Thursday, 6 November 2008

Untuk Diri Ku

UNTUKMU HAWA
Seindah Hiasan Adalah Wanita yang solehah
Sebagai renungan dan peringatan buat diriku dan sahabat2 yang lain
Hawa,
Andai engkau masih remaja,
Jadilah anak yang solehah buat kedua ibu bapamu.
Andai engkau sudah bersuami
Jadilah isteri yang meringankan beban suamimu,
Andai engkau masih ibu,
Didiklah anakmu sehingga dia tidak gentar memperjuangkan ad-din Allah.
Hawa,
Andai engkau belum berkahwin
Jangan kau risau jodohmu,
Ingatlah hawa janji Tuhan kita.
Jangan dimulakan sebuah pertemuan
dengan lelaki yang bukan muhrim,
kerana khuatir dari mata jatuh ke hati,
maka lahirnya senyuman
maka tercetusnya salam
dan sekaligus disusuli
dengan pertemuan takut lahirnya
nafsu kejahatan yang menguasai diri.
Hawa,
Lelaki yang baik tidak melihat paras rupa,
Lelaki yang soleh tidak memilih wanita melalui keseksiannnya,
Lelaki yang warak tidak menilai wanita melalui keayuannya,
keremajaannya, serta kemampuannya menggoncang iman lelaki,
tetapi lelaki yang baik akan menilai wanita melalui akhlaknya,
peribadinya dan yang penting pegangan agamanya.
Lelaki yang baik juga tidak menginginkan
pertemuan dengan wanita yang bukan muhrimnya
kerana dia takut memberi kesempatan
kepada syaitan untuk menggodanya.
Lelaki yang warak juga tidak mahu
bermain cinta kerana dia tahu apa matlamat
dalam sebuah pertemuan lelaki dan wanita
yakni sebuah perkahwinan.
Oleh itu hawa,
Jagalah pandanganmu,
Awasilah auratmu,
Pelihara lah akhlakmu
Kuatkan pendirianmu.
Andai ditakdirkan tiada cinta
daripada Adam untukmu,
Cukuplah hanya cinta Allah
Memenuhi dan menyinari kekosongan jiwamu.
Biarlah hanya cinta daripada
kedua ibu bapamu yang memberi
hangatan kebahagiaan buat dirimu,
cukuplah sekadar cinta adik-beradik
serta keluarga yang membahagiakan dirimu.
Hawa..
Cintailah Allah di kala susah dan senang
kerana kau akan memperolehi cinta
daripada insan yang juga mencintai Allah.
Cintailah kedua ibu bapamu
kerana kau akan memperolehi keredhaan Allah.
Cintailah keluargamu
kerana kau tak akan jumpa
cinta yang bahagia selain
daripada cinta keluarga.

Failures in my life

academically + affective domainly :P

i wish to have my own checklists table of failures in my life.....
so that i could fill it day by day,week by week,month by month,year by year...
it sounds so "bersemangat" right?

should failures being secreted?

i dont think so.....
people would say"membuka pekung di dada"
failures VS "aib"
they are two different thing...

Saturday, 9 August 2008

aku Yang LEMAH


salam....

somebody ask me..... what would you like to do during free time?
or the simpler words...what is your hobby?

Very long time i rarely hear somebody almost my age ask my hobby :P
I was speechless and not things came into my mind....

i just replied: i have no specific hobby...

huh...how dull my life....
read books : 40%
writting : 40%
gardening : 50%
listen to music : 60%
chat with my mum : 60%
baking at home : 80%
cooking : 80%

I think i know what are the gross reasons that i do not really have free time....
topic: upbringging
background : the only daughter & the youngest in family


maybe my interest was diverted since my childhood life.....
i tend to help out my mum to assisted and lessen her responsibilities....

in terms of:
a) financial by assisting her did the monthly budget for our family expenses
b) house work, since she is working and there is no helper at home, three of us was trained to have a duty roaster as what she always implement it at school. Here, my interest in cooking and baking was developed especially during hari raya -"buat kuih raya" If im not mistaken when i was form 1, she just bought the ingredients and she just left them for me prepare kueh raya and monitered while she went sewing up stairs.

c) gardening : i was lucky to have my late atuk Abdullah (my neighbour)-Al- Fatihah for him. He helped me out in gardening - we planted various vegetables in the small piece of land at my garden. I did really enjoyed that moment because i learnt alot from him. Alhamdulillah we shared the products. Here i gained an interest in argiculture world.

d) business : my mum is all rounder women, she managed to run some business, all the while i tend to escort her slowly i understand how to run business & the risks. Alhamdulillah during long holiday after SPM & STPM i managed to run small business sell cakes.

now i realised why i dont have any specific hobby and during primary school time, i always "goreng" my hobby was cycling.Anyway i love cycling but i just dont have enough opportunity to do so. For now during free time i dont know my excat hobby. May be surfing internet,reading magazine & novel and writting crappy in the blog is my new hobbies...sometimes i felt my life is dull but i believe that i have my own colour.